I was 23 when I recognized a serious problem… Speaking with a friend, I told him of the issue, “it doesn’t matter what is happening in my life – I could have 99 amazing things going for me, but one thing causing stress or heartache, that’s what my mind focuses on incessantly.” 

He replied with confusion, “But I don’t get how you can recognize that and still only focus on the negative.” I didn’t understand it either, it was a difficult time… 

What I now understand is how prevalent this type of behavior is for those with perfectionist tendencies. The constant rumination – worrying about negative events – is an ongoing struggle. 

Perfectionists exhibit a difficult combination of behaviors that can make living in the present moment quite difficult. There exists a desire to achieve, often accompanied by unrealistic expectations, all-or-nothing thinking, and finally a state of dissatisfaction until the goal is accomplished.

In this scenario the mind takes over, finding more reasons to be unhappy, more work that’s incomplete, and feelings of unworthiness creep in. We wonder why we’re not farther along or more successful. 

“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”

– Albert Einstein

Perfectionism is a problem of the mind. Yet, trying to ‘fix’ our thinking from this space is an uphill battle, at best. 

Not only is it rather trite to suggest a person, “just focus on the positive,” but it’s also incredibly ineffective. Albert Einstein was credited with saying, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” 

And moving to a new state of consciousness is best approached when we include, not only the mind, but also the body and breathe. Each compliment the others – we can use the body and breath to heal the mind, the mind and breath to heal the body, or body and mind to heal our breath. 

It took years trying to ‘change my thinking’ before I adopted a holistic approach that cared for my body’s needs and helped change destructive patterns that left me anxious, constantly stressed, unhappy, and feeling like I was letting myself down along with everyone around me. 

When constantly trapped in our mind, the world can be a lonely and difficult place to exist. 

But we can be free from the mind’s constant chatter; we are at our best when the heart and mind function coherently. We learn to live in the present moment, free from the burden of doubt, concern about mistakes, fear of failure, or the perceived expectations of others – all defining features of perfectionistic thinking. 

Meditate, develop an intimate relationship with your breath, and listen to your body and the type of movement it craves. You will heal mind, body, and soul while realizing you can stop fighting against the world when striving toward your goals. Solutions to your problems will appear, in what seems like out of the blue, but it all starts with a quiet mind, and a willingness to listen to the whispers from our intuition. 

I wish you ease on your journey.